Sunday, 19 February 2012
Make mine a side of Skinny, please?
I joined a gym. Not any old gym, but a tiny one. For Women Only. The concept is simple and in theory should be very effective. I am trying not to get my hopes up and keep telling myself to be realistic. However, I have caught myself daydreaming about my soon-to-be-revealed Cindy Crawford-esque body. I know Cindy Crawford is very old skool, the Supers circa 1990, but Miranda Kerr and her multimillion-pound-Victoria-Secret-Bra-finale-walk-6-weeks-after-giving-birth is hugely out of my reach!
In my head I am a few weeks into my new regime and find myself waving with my hand and not my wings, my muffin top is reserved for the (non fat) blueberry variety on my plate alongside a skinny, soya, no-caffeine latte and I get out of bed in the morning using my newly formed 6-pack…
…back in the real world I have to actually go to the gym (at least) 3 times a week, have to give up crisps, cheese, chocolate and CUT DOWN on the wine. I mostly feel this can all happen. I am determined. I am ready. I am enthusiastic. And I spent a large part of this weekend eating out the snack cupboard to allow for no temptation next week. See, already I am making huge personal sacrifices for my size 12-goal!?
After my first training session on Saturday morning, I am still raring to go, but do have one small sort-of-complaint. The staff. Not that they are not very helpful, friendly and encouraging, but that they are not uber-hot. I prefer my gym-staff to look way hotter than I do *think I do*. I want to see swishy hair, buns of steel and legs that make Heidi Klum look dumpy. I want to think “phwoar!” whilst pounding the step machine. Or maybe a better word is “motivated”?
On the other hand, maybe the fact that this gym is already unconventional in every other way, this is the last stereotype to go? With that in mind, I may even get good results this time… Watch this space.